Day 90...moo

Apr 19

Martyn is 90 days old today! What the heck? How is it possible that he is three months old already? The time is just flying by.

Today was not bad at all. It was beautiful weather out, and work actually felt like I was getting back into the swing of things. It felt good actually. I missed Martyn like crazy, but not like I thought I was going to. I thought before I went back to work, that I would just be completely distraught over not being with him all day. I didn't feel like that, which I'm glad for.

However, I do miss him being able to nurse when ever he wants. I put myself on a pumping schedule, which seems to be pretty good so far, but I'm starting to feel a bit like a cow....oh well.

When I picked Martyn up this evening, he was sitting in Janelle's little bouncy baby seat, with a rattle in his hand. Janelle's baby girl was laying on the floor next to him, with a rattle in her hand, and Janelle says to me, "we're having a little rattle time." It was super cute! I wished I had had my camera with me. Martyn was very happy, and it sounds like he had a good day, with a minimal amount of fussing.

When we got home, he was ready to snuggle up with mama and nurse right away, which was good because I was REALLY ready for him to. I still had to pump the other side, one side was way too much for him as it was.

The sun was really bright and shining in the living room, and I sat Martyn on the floor on his little mat, with the boppy. It was so nice to just chat with him, and play with him and not have to worry about dinner...Eli had texted me earlier and asked if we could get take out tonight and I was all for it.

When he came home, Eli was really tired and hungry. He ate and I held the baby, then we tried to switch but poor Martyn didn't want to be held by anyone but mama. I told Eli to not have his feelings hurt, think about the adjustment Martyn was going through...being used to having his mama all day, every day, with him and now I'm sitting right here and not holding him.

He took a little nap, and woke up and was cranky so I decided it was time for bed. He went down pretty easy, although I just heard him making a little noise....I don't know if he woke up, or if he was just getting situated. I think the latter.

Tomorrow will be Eli's first (nearly) full day with Martyn. He has to go into work for an hour for some certification, so Grandpa Walt is going to come over and take care of Martyn for an hour. I'm really glad for that, but I have to admit I'm feeling just a little nervous about it. Both men love Martyn and mean well for him, but they just don't have a mothers instinct. It seems funny to me, that after having left Martyn with a woman I barely know, and now he's going to be with his daddy and grandpa who he knows and I know and love, that I would feel nervous about them caring for him....it'll be fine.

I just need to get over myself.